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| Volume 11, No. 43 |
July 28-3, 2010 |
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| Soul Vomiting on the Internet
Increasingly, people turn to Web to bare souls | | By Jennifer Nittoso | | 
I’m a big fan of two things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position.
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No, this isn’t an article about hangovers. The statement above is an entry/confession on the site TextsFromLastNight.com (TFLN).
What’s Up recently ran an article that featured TFLN, a website where people can anonymously enter their, um, texts from last night. The entries range from perplexing to pathetic but are nearly always hilarious – for their sheer outrageousness or, more often than we care to admit, for their familiarity. Another example:
“I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it’s legit.” (Knowing my fondness for Ambien-texting, a friend suggested I program this one into my own cell phone as a quick-text.)
Another recent fascination is fmylife.com. Here’s a recent entry:
“Today, I was walking down the strip with a friend when we saw a homeless man with no arm. I felt bad, so I gave him some cash and I looked into his poor little eyes when he put out his arm for a hug. Without thinking, I hugged him. Right as I was thinking, ‘wtf am I doing,’ he kissed my boob. FML“
The list of websites like these, all of which share a common thread (we’ll get to that), goes on and on:
• Dearoldlove.tumblr.com, where contributors post notes to current or former loves
• Possecret.blogspot.com, a receptacle for secrets
• Howigotlaidoff.com, whose name is self-explanatory
What these websites have in common is they allow users to share intimate, personal details of their lives to the entire world – in some cases, things you might not tell your best friend. The interweb has replaced our Hello Kitty diaries and our paisley-print journals. It has rendered obsolete our long letters in which we confided in our bosom companions.
Now, in 25 words or less, our generation soul-vomits onto the keyboard and unleashes it upon society.
And I could devote another entire article to the rampant and entirely un-anonymous over-sharing that goes on in my friends’ Facebook status updates. (Did I really need to know that you are the one responsible for “stinking up” the 26th-floor bathroom at your job?)
“This isn’t really a new phenomenon,” says Jared Degnan, a Nashville-based social media expert. “Dear Abby has been allowing people to anonymously and publicly vent for years,” he says. (More than half a century, in fact – Dear Abby was founded in 1956.) ”But technology has allowed it to become a lot more prevalent.”
Degnan, 28, is quickly becoming a social media marketing guru, helping to take companies to a new level by reaching young consumers through platforms like Facebook and Twitter. He also helps these companies develop policies on exactly how to do that – as social media is an emerging medium, and the rules are far from hard and fast.
“Sometimes these posts are funny and harmless; sometimes depressing; and I imagine they can be cathartic for the posters,” he says. “What I like about Post Secret is it’s about the vulnerability of being human. It’s not malicious.”
TFLN, though, walks a fine line, he says. And then there are sites like the now-defunct JuicyCampus.com, which allowed users to spread college gossip. Think “Cruel (Internet) Intentions.”
“Considering our fascination with reality TV and our culture’s increasingly voyeuristic nature, of course more and more sites like these are popping up,” Degnan says.
Perhaps our fascination with these sites can be summed up in one word: Schadenfreude – taking pleasure in the misfortune of others.
“Just when I think I will be overcome with an urge to snarf down a whole bottle of Lexapro, I turn to FML and I feel like my life is worth living since there are people who have it so much worse than me,” says 37-year-old Laura.
“Schadenfreude is always funny. These sites make me happy that I’m not you,” says Mark, 26.
“Because once in a while, everyone needs affirmation that peeps are more screwed up than you,” says 37-year-old Kristy.
But we’re not pure evil, right? These sites, and their social networking counterparts, have their purposefulness … right?
“Status updates can make for a great icebreaker. Nothing like asking about that drunken night at Whiskey Dicks or that Chlamydia flare-up to ease your way into a conversation,” says Ryan, 26.
“I love these websites because they show the true hilarity/sadness in everyday, normal, real-life situations,” says another 26-year-old Ryan.
“You’ll never find this in a Hallmark card, dammit – ‘Riding my bike to work makes me as sore as sex with you did. But I can’t get mad at my bike for a lack of foreplay,’” Laura says.
“It’s almost like a Greek tragedy – like Icarus,” Degnan says.
And like Icarus – a figure from Greek mythology who used wings fashioned out of wax to escape Crete, but then was so overcome by the joy of flying that he got too close to the sun, melted his wings and fell to his death – Degnan is sure our iWings will eventually melt as well.
“In many cases, these websites are ‘communities,’ and they police themselves – but they are a tragedy waiting to happen.”
Degnan points out that “anonymous” isn’t really anonymous. IP addresses leave a footprint – these entries can be traced. Sooner or later, someone will get miffed, someone will sue, and there will be a backlash – followed by a correction. Perhaps stricter policies enforced by the sites, for example.
So is this evolving phenomenon just a harmless byproduct of our increasingly virtual world, or are these sites the hallmark of an imminent social apocalypse?
“Oh, I think we’re going to hell in a handbasket,” Degnan says. “But personally – I find it amusing.”
You can read more from Degnan at jarreddegnan.com. You can waste the rest of your life on the other websites mentioned in this article.
Comments or questions about this story? E-mail Secret@whatsuppub.com
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